Have you ever known someone that never had anything good to say? They saw the negative side to every situation, and nothing seemed to give them hope or make them happy. It’s unlikely that most of these people are very successful because the negative talk makes it hard to focus on succeeding.
In the same way the negative talk can sabotage one’s plans for success and happiness, positive self talk can contribute to those goals.
Here are some ways to incorporate positive self talk into your life.
Find the Good
As mentioned above, some people find the bad in every situation. How can someone be happy when they live that way? The answer is that they can’t. They focus on and talk about the negative all the time, so they feel miserable.
Instead, work to find the good in every situation and in every person, including yourself. Sometimes, that will be easy to do, while other times it will be more of a challenge. Here is one extreme example.
Two women suffered the loss of a child. One woman only talked about the unfairness of losing her daughter. She often said she’d never be happy again, and that she hated life, hated God and wish she’d never been born. While such extreme emotions may be understandable, the other mother took a different route.
She talked about how blessed she was to have her daughter for as long as she did. She said even though the pain is sometimes unbearable, she wouldn’t trade it if it meant she’d never have been able to have her daughter.
Fast forward five years. The first mother is still practically drowning in sorrow. As a result, her marriage is suffering and her other children are not getting the attention the need. The second mother has been able to accept her loss and cherishes her other children even more.
Her positive self talk helped her through her grief, while the first mother’s negative talk kept her a prisoner to it.
Yes, that example is extreme, but the same principle applies whether the situation is very serious or not.
Find the good in every situation. It’s there. You just have to look for it.
Rehearse Your Goals
Another part of positive self talk is stating your goals out loud. Saying, “I will operate a successful business” or “I will get my master’s degree” is a way to keep the goals in the front of your mind. Also, by saying them out loud, you can help to convince yourself that these goals are possible, and that you can achieve them.
Make it a habit every morning when you look in the mirror to practice positive self talk. Say “This is going to be a good day” or “You look great today”. Say anything that is a positive affirmation of yourself, your life and/or your goals.
Don’t skip a day, but instead make this as much as a part of your daily routine as brushing your teeth. At the same time, cast off ALL negative talk. Do not focus on that new wrinkle or the pound you think you gained over the weekend. Remember the first section and FIND THE GOOD.
Positive self talk can help to change your attitude about yourself and your surroundings. People that talk about how miserable they are could usually do something about that by incorporating some positive self talk into their day.
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